Having a baby can be one of the happiest times in a new mother's life. While the experience can be at times overwhelming due to stress and exhaustion, generally mothers adapt to their new role without much difficulty. Sometimes, however, new mothers experience a form of depression — known as postpartum depression— that can make the stress and exhaustion feel overwhelming.



While approximately 13 percent of mothers experience postpartum depression it often goes undiagnosed because new mothers are afraid of speaking up about their feelings, at times viewing themselves as bad mothers who are unable to cope. Postpartum depression is not, however, a reflection of a mother's ability to care or love for her child. In fact, it can be a response to the rapid hormonal changes that occur after giving birth, and treatment can help. Below are some surprising symptoms of postpartum depression new mothers should not ignore.

You're sad and crying all the time

This may be one of the more obvious symptoms of postpartum depression. Ever since you had your baby you seem to be crying all the time. The littlest things set you off into weeping and you aren't sure why. Brooke Shields famously spoke and wrote about her own struggle with postpartum depression and compared her crying to the rain that washed away the spider in the Itsy Bitsy Spider nursery rhyme.

Not only can sadness and crying be attributed to the hormonal changes you're going through as a new mother, they may also be a byproduct of lack of sleep and pure exhaustion. Still, if you find you seem to be sad and crying more days than not, it may be helpful to speak with someone.

You feel anxious

While some level of worry is normal as a new parent, many women who experience postpartum depression present with a mixture of anxiety and depression. This can sometimes be hard to distinguish from normal levels of worry and anxiety that accompany becoming a new mom, and is therefore at risk of being overlooked. While worrying about new sounds, tendencies, and reactions your baby produces is pretty normal, worrying constantly about things you can't control, or that seem illogical or impossible to other people, it could be a red flag. If you feel like your anxiety is above and beyond what you think you should be feeling, or if your worry seems constant, talk to your doctor.


You're angry

Maybe everything seems to make you angry lately. Your family and friends are suddenly irritating you incessantly. You feel like throwing things and yelling, but don't know why you feel so mad all the time. This too can be a symptom of postpartum depression. In some forms of depression, including postpartum depression, sudden bouts of anger known as anger attacks can produce a pounding heart, sweating, and chest tightness. It could be that tiny slights are setting you off or things that would normally just irritate you a little are making you explode in anger. Regardless, if you're feeling more frustrated and angry than usual now that you've had a baby, postpartum depression could be an underlying cause.

You have scary or intrusive thoughts

If you've ever had thoughts of harming your baby when he or she is crying, it was likely quite scary for you. Or maybe you've had sudden thoughts of just picking up and leaving your whole family since you gave birth. These thoughts are referred to as intrusive thoughts because they are unwanted and in conflict with how a person normally feels or behaves. While this can be alarming, it is not uncommon among women who experience postpartum depression.

In one study of women who were exposed to either infant crying or infant cooing for ten minutes, 23.5 percent of all women said they had unwanted thoughts of active harm (e.g., throwing, yelling at, shaking the infant). The women in the "crying" group were more likely to have these thoughts than women in the "cooing" group. Intrusive thoughts, while associated with some mental illnesses, are not that uncommon in general. One study that examined people across six continents found that roughly 94 percent of people reported at least one intrusive thought in a three month period. While almost everyone has occasional intrusive thoughts, and having the thoughts does not mean you actually want to act on them, an increase in these thoughts can signal symptoms of postpartum depression.


You feel numb

Maybe you aren't crying, yelling, or having intrusive thoughts, but it's because you aren't feeling much of anything. You may feel empty now that you've had your baby, and like you're just going through the motions of your day. You may feel alone even when you're surrounded by people. Feelings of emptiness as well as an inability to find joy or pleasure in anything are symptoms of depression, including postpartum depression.

This lack of feeling may be particularly alarming for new mothers who don't feel bonded to their children. At the same time you may feel hopeless, like no matter what you do you'll never feel bonded to your child or able to be a good mother. This feeling of being numb or not being able to bond is an important factor in diagnosing postpartum depression, even serving as the basis for a clinical questionnaire in clinical practice.

Read More